Amanda Palmer Serenades The Great Killers
you don’t know how little you’ve been paying attention until you look down at your legs again.
you don’t know how many times you can say you’re coming until they just stop believing you.
you don’t know how orgasmic the act of taking in a lungful of oxygen is until they hold your head under the water.
you don’t know how many vietnamese soft rolls to order.
- Amanda Palmer, "A Poem For Dzhokhar"
For Ted Bundy and That Smile
Because you killed all those women and your eyes
Because Neil is boring as fuck
Because your hands around my neck
Because I’m actually famous and safe
Because Ann Rule was too old for you
Because the gray skies and laundered grunge of Seattle
Because the worst shall be first
Fire and Slice
Some say that murder’s finest stanza
Was daubed by Jack the Ripper;
From what I’ve seen of Adam Lanza
It’s obvious he’s (duh!) way hipper.
But oh, if we could hit replay
I’d watch the Ripper’s blood bonanza,
Then count up Adam’s KIA.
Amanda Palmer’s Ode to Jeffrey Dahmer (under the influence of Dr. Seuss)
I hate it when they go away!
I’ve found a way to make them stay.
I stab them once, I stab them twice,
I put their body parts on ice.
When I hear “Jeff, we’ve grown apart…”
I smoke his tongue and braise his heart.
A Poem for Joker (James Holmes)
With your eyes wide as hubcaps by the interstate succumbing to entropy
With your hair neon orange beautiful in the gun light
With your presumably sad childhood experiences you may have been abused I bet
With your uncompleted dissertation scrambled footnotes clear key deadline miss
With your body count from Nam and here I tie it back to the B-52s the planes not the band
With your pop culture allusion and the firepower to back it up
With your dead friend Heath slumped over your two gun shoulders like a bearskin cape
Will you go out with me?
For Amanda Knox: A Proposition
You found Amanda Huginkiss
And killed, but you’re no Dahmer;
Quit acting like the thug in this
And try Amanda Palmer.